Just last Saturday, the results of a survey was published in the Straits Times about racial and religious tolerance.
In that survey, respondents were asked, inter alia, how willing they were to have friends or their children's friends or their spouses to be of various religions.
What caught my eye was the responses of the respondents who claimed to be Christians.
Where friends and children's friends are concerned, a high percentage (87% and above) of them were willing to mingle with those from other religions.
When it came to the choice of a spouse, these were the results.
Marrying a
Buddhist/Taoist (54%)
Muslim (28%)
Hindu (32%)
fellow Christian (97%)
other religion (44%)
Free-thinker (72%)
While the above findings show that Christians are the most discriminatory when it comes to choosing a spouse, I am still somewhat surprised that the figures are actually not significantly lower! Probably not all of them know about 2 Cor 6:14...
As a teenage boy growing up in church, I remember attending a talk on boy-girl relationships (BGR) and being told specifically "not to be unequally yoked with unbelievers".
The speaker gave the illustration of two oxen tilling the ground. If the oxen are not equally laden, then one will be pulling harder than the other, and what will result is that the plough will not travel in a straight line.
Essentially, he was telling us that we should only stick to Christians when it comes to looking for a potential spouse. Some fellow participants said that maybe one could help convert one's boyfriend / girlfriend, to which he gave another illustration: the Christian is like a person standing on a table, while the non-Christian is like a person standing on the ground. It is easier for the non-Christian to pull the Christian down than for the Christian to pull the non-Christian up.
In other epistles of Paul, he likens the marriage relationship between husband and wife to that of Christ and the church. If either spouse is not a believer, then he or she would not be able to appreciate this analogy. The non-Christian husband will not understand what it means to love his wife sacificially the way Christ loves the church. Similarly, the non-Christian wife will not understand what it means to submit to her husband the way the church is to submit to the authority of Christ.
Furthermore, one of the key attributes (if not THE main attribute) of a potential spouse should be Christlikeness. A person who is a pre-believer will NOT have this attribute, so it begs the question whether he or she should even be considered marriage material to begin with.
In fact, if we continue to read that passage in 2 Cor 6, Paul goes on to use very strong words...
"For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? 15What harmony is there between Christ and the devil? 16What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever? What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols? For we are the temple of the living God."
When it comes to making friends, sure, we have to be the salt of the earth and light of the world. We cannot be discriminatory. Jesus Himself ate with publicans and tax-collectors.
But when it comes to marriage (which is a very serious matter as it is a covenant between two parties that is made before God), there can be absolutely no compromise. [Yep, not even under grace... After all, this letter of Paul was written this side of the cross].
So dear brothers and sisters. If your current girlfriend or boyfriend is a prebeliever, you have to take God at His Word and make a stand. Have a good opinion of God and believe that He will never shortchange you. As things stand, he or she is definitely not the one for you. Sure, she or he may become a believer in the future, but until that happens, do not be in an unequally-yoked relationship. It is putting the cart before the horse.
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